The idea that an engagement requires a ring is surprisingly recent. For most of human history, engagements were marked by a handshake between families, a verbal promise, or a small gift - and the gift was rarely jewellery.
In medieval Europe, betrothal tokens varied wildly. Some men gave a carved wooden ring. Others gave a "posy ring" - a simple band engraved with a short poem or phrase on the inside. Gimmel rings, split into two interlocking bands worn separately during engagement and joined at marriage, were popular in the 16th and 17th centuries.
In some cultures, no ring was given at all. A promise was a promise. In others, the woman gave the man something - a glove, a cloth, a coin.
The thimble was briefly fashionable in Puritan America, where jewellery was considered frivolous. A man would give a thimble as a practical, spiritually acceptable token. Some accounts suggest women would cut off the top of the thimble to create a simple ring - which rather defeats the Puritan logic.
The diamond solitaire engagement ring as we know it today was born in the late 19th century when large diamond deposits were discovered in South Africa. Suddenly there was supply. De Beers was created to control it. And marketers were hired to create demand.
Before the post-war advertising push, diamond engagement rings were far from the default in North America.
What this tells us isn't that modern traditions are fake. It's that traditions have always been invented, adapted, and passed forward. The meaning is something people pour in - not something that comes with the stone.
